The Human Condition

Hi Nila, I just found your blog when I Googled my ...

2012-01-26T21:02:50.892-05:00

Hi Nila, I just found your blog when I Googled my strengths. I share four of your strengths (I have Maximizer instead of Learner) and I, too, learned how what I thought were weaknesses could really be strengths. This tool is making me realize that I have something to offer others (I thought I just lived in my head!) and I have recommended the Strengths Finder assessment to my family and friends. I'm glad I stumbled upon your blog, I enjoy reading it and I relate to your introversion as well. I, too, work in the creative/marketing field.

Nila, I'm just reading your website for the fi...

2011-11-30T08:25:44.402-05:00

Nila,
I'm just reading your website for the first time. Hello. My name is Ed Smith, and I'm a StrengthsFinder addict. I am motivated to contribute here because of your "About Me" profile. The resonance while reading it makes me want to comment.

Here are my StrengthsFinder strengths: Futuristic, Strategic, Ideation, Individualization, Communication.

There are times when I feel one or the other of these themes is dominating my life. At the moment it is the Individualization Theme.

The more I see what is unique about a person, the more I want to understand about that uniqueness. Each person I meet is a work of art, and I quickly lose myself in the wonderment that this person I am talking to was created to be the best in the world.... at something.

I am hooked on the idea that if what makes the person unique can be determined, the world will be a better place, and the lives of everyone who comes in contact with the individual will be improved, enriched, made better in any number of ways.

And I find exhilarating the idea that I had a significant part in helping the individual discover what that special niche is, and how to be more and more in tune with it--and less and less engaged in ways that others think he or she should be.

Today's Overrated Idea About People: Well-roundedness.

Well-Roundedness may well be the enemy of a person working from his or her strengths. It may be a illusion. To become well-rounded, a person must spend large amounts of time trying to gain competence in an area in which he or she is not competent. Usually any progress in improving weaknesses is temporary, and requires 80% of one's time struggling to keep the weakness up to the "average" level.

This is tragic, if only because the natural strengths remain clouded and diminished while this struggle is going on. Here is the advice from Marcus Buckingham--"Find out what you don't enjoy doing, and (my note here: eventually) stop doing it.

I have 4 of the five that you have. Input, Empathy...

2011-08-31T13:04:29.430-04:00

I have 4 of the five that you have.
Input, Empathy, Competition, Learner and Connectedness.

I love this! You are a very talented writer. You...

2011-02-02T16:42:04.279-05:00

I love this! You are a very talented writer. Your post was refreshing and inspiring. Thank you!

Hello Nila, I feel fortunate to come across your b...

2011-02-02T16:30:53.122-05:00

Hello Nila,
I feel fortunate to come across your blog; I am searching for articles, blogs, websites, and whatever else I can find on the theme of Input. My top 5 are Input, Strategic, Ideation, Learner, and Relator. While Input is my number one, I'm not sure how to develop this talent within the workplace! Or, rather, what work/job/career coincides well with Input. According to the Strengths Finder book, it appears that teaching, journalism, and research are very fitting, but do you have any other ideas or insights? I know that my comment isn't an answer to your question, but I thought you would be a great person to ask! I am also very intrigued that you are a certified MBTI practitioner. Thank you for any "input" that you could give me!

Chelsea from California

I now allow myself to enjoy Intellection. It'...

2011-02-01T21:50:04.705-05:00

I now allow myself to enjoy Intellection. It's more productive for me when I have problems to solve, with output that can be valued by others. Here's the challenge: staying in the conversation to stay connected. I also value friends with qualities who complement all this thinking. My 5 themes are Responsibility, Connectedness, Context, Learner and Intellection. I introduced an acquaintance to Strengthfinders and we became better friends when we found we shared Intellection. The strength I covet: Strategic. It would save me so much time. Thanks for recommendations on reading.

Intellection was 4th on my list of Strengths with ...

2010-12-31T18:41:29.186-05:00

Intellection was 4th on my list of Strengths with Learner as my top strength so this may be mixing of strengths somewhat for my answer. I enjoy playing with puzzles and figuring out stuff. This can be how to solve some technical problem like how to create a web form that connects a couple of systems where I work or it could trying to see how a couple of characters in some TV show relate to each other. While I work as a Web Developer, I tend to think of my job as more of a general problem solver. I get to hear someone wants to do X and I make it happen. This can require thinking or tapping into the massive database that is in my head already.

In group settings I can tend to be that person to ask some odd question or share an insight that can make people think I'm really smart or deep. In reality, I just enjoy thinking that it is a near natural thing for me to play in my mind with stuff in an abstract way.

Just to state all 5 of my themes for anyone wondering: Learner, Achiever, Responsibility, Intellection and Strategic.

Thanks to both of your for your comments. Brian, h...

2010-12-20T17:27:53.007-05:00

Thanks to both of your for your comments. Brian, how about you share a little of that Focus with me?

Since I wrote that post, I've found LibraryThing to help me catalog my books. I WAS using Delicious until the recent Yahoo! oops. I've found a suitable alternative, though. I've cut down on how many things I print and put in real folders and instead lean on technology with my MacBook Pro, MacBook Air and iPhone. I'm still learning to use the information for the benefit of myself and others. I think that's about keeping my ears open.

Happy hunting and gathering!

Hey, Nila. Input is a wonderful quality that enabl...

2010-12-19T22:18:01.307-05:00

Hey, Nila. Input is a wonderful quality that enables you to gather, appreciate, and imagine in a way many others don't. I share both Intellection and Input with you (and Mike) above, along with Focus--thank goodness, lest Input continue forever.

I am a college professor. Academic culture allows and encourages research like Input fosters. Files, folders, and any type of categorization is important, but beware becoming a slave to it. It takes discipline to let many good collectibles go. Besides files on religion (my subject), I have found myself memorizing lists of monarchs on vacation and keeping identification cards like aniimal tracks and constellations. Many misunderstand, but for us it's interesting and a future opportunity.

Keep exploring how to use it well!

Brian from Georgia

In the natural world, the only thing constant is c...

2010-11-23T15:44:32.606-05:00

In the natural world, the only thing constant is change. I think that rings true in the human world too- not that we aren't part of the natural world, but thats a whole different debate. Your year tested your ability not only to handle the changes, but to embrace them and learn from them. This is a valuable thing all in itself.

I saw a note in a colleagues office today that said "the next 5 minutes are the most important." Combine that with your comment about something being wiped away with the brush of a hand and it gives one lots to ponder.

Thanks Nila, for the mind candy! XXOO Vp

What a beautiful post, Nila. Your words made me st...

2010-11-23T14:03:22.253-05:00

What a beautiful post, Nila. Your words made me stop and think how we should be grateful for every moment, no matter how small or inconsequential we may perceive it to be. As you so elegantly wrote, impermanence affects us all. Let's be thankful for the moments that light up our lives and make us smile, for they can be fleeting and do not last forever.

I am thankful to have been able to come across your blog and be reminded of all the blessings in my life.

I was moved by your article. In the midst of doing...

2010-11-23T13:29:47.810-05:00

I was moved by your article. In the midst of doing the day to day (some better than others), it's not often that we take the time to pause, reflect and just soak it all in. After all, there's work to do, commitments to attend...

I'm impressed by your never-ending ability to self-reflect and take the kernels of truth that are yielded by this simple act and turning them into positives.

For that, I'm thankful.

I felt the same when my dad passed away. I too beg...

2010-08-09T15:36:12.298-04:00

I felt the same when my dad passed away. I too began to worry about being 'parentless'. I'm still scared of that.

Hang in there though. You'll start to hurt less and smile more as you remember good times.

Nila, I'm sorry to hear about all of your lo...

2010-08-04T15:34:42.103-04:00

Nila,

I'm sorry to hear about all of your losses, especially the loss of your father. This summer has been quite a transitional summer for a lot of folks. I hope you are able to find some great ways to embrace all the changes taking place, and use them to make you even stronger than you already are.

Have you found a new group to replace the one that is folding?

If you need a friend to talk to anytime, please reach out. I think you are great!

Nicki

I'm have a ridiculously similar conversation w...

2010-05-24T16:09:10.746-04:00

I'm have a ridiculously similar conversation with myself about my Twitter feed. I intentionally only use Facebook for 'personal' relationships - not professional - but even still there are people I would NEVER meet for coffee in my Facebook 'friends' list. Hmmm.

Me too, me too! http://shouldhavezagged.wordpress...

2010-05-06T11:19:09.159-04:00

Me too, me too!

http://shouldhavezagged.wordpress.com/2009/11/25/tweetsgiving/

I've made the same observations. Marsh offers ...

2010-05-06T11:16:27.545-04:00

I've made the same observations. Marsh offers a bag credit but you have to ask for it -- I was only given it once without asking, which is how I found out about it -- and only lately do I consistently get a cashier that knows what I'm talking about. I think the stores that sell their own branded cheapo bags should encourage their use but that's not always the case. Wal-Mart cashiers seem to prefer that you not bring your own bags because they are operating by habit and doing something other than mindlessly stuffing those plastic bags on the rack is a change to the routine. (By "stuffing" I mean "adding 1-3 items and moving on to the next bag" since I go home with about a dozen bags for every 20-30 items that I buy.)

I try to take my own bags as much as possible to as many places as I can remember them. Sometimes I ask for no bag when I'm only buying a few items and walk out carrying them in my hands. I bought a giant blue tarpaulin bag at IKEA for something like $0.69 and it holds a cart's load of stuff, which is crazy convenient at Sam's Club and Wal-Mart. My favorites are a black and white set of Envirosax that I leave in the car.

My MIL loves to shop at Aldi and I gave her a set of Envirosax once I found out about their no-free-bags policy. She loves having a stylish set of bags to take with her. She tells me that people pay for the disposable bags which BLOWS MY MIND.

I just wrote about Dunbar's number recently! ...

2010-05-02T15:59:20.395-04:00

I just wrote about Dunbar's number recently!

http://www.robbyslaughter.com/blog/?2010-04-08

I'd actually recommend that you *increase* your number of friends (I'm nearly 700) while increasing your filtering. Divide people into groups. Turn off all of the annoying game notifications. Help yourself to connect more meaningfully, not reduce your number of connections.

Hey, I just took the test and was listed as intell...

2010-04-28T18:20:34.074-04:00

Hey, I just took the test and was listed as intellection, restorative, connection, ideation and input. Four of mine are thinking and I can definatly attest to that! Yes, although im only 21 I have had difficulties in the work force on account of these strengths -I also thought they were weakness'. To compensate for them I needed to find jobs that allowed me to work relatively alone. Im also a bit of a learner and often at work im processing information while trying to focus on my tasks. My last job as a stock boy for the produce dept at a store was perfect because they had a repetitive routine and the work was physical enough -and i was mostly alone- that I could blank out after a while and do my work while thinking about other stuff. Its been my concern that Im not going to be able to succeed at any higher paying job because i didn't think I could climb the ladder to those jobs since so often I don't think of the right things at the right times. Well, reading your blog and the following comments -as well as the book- I realize there is a place where I can succeed and im not going to have to punish myself the entire way there! I say punish because before, for instance during a year of college, I would spend long hours trying to focus on specific needed tasks like an essay or some other assignment; I am not an achiever hence the struggle. Now I realize I need to partner with someone who has those strengths and choose my classes besed on which class will work with my strength. Essays are painful! My thoughts never finish!

I am encouraged by your success Nila. Thats what im trying to say.

About connectedness: Its about relationships yet it occurs in the thinking sphere whereas other relational strengths are physical or practical. The actual strengths to do something with the connections one sees or express them are seperate from the strength to see the connections.

NIce to meet you. There are so many ways to filte...

2010-04-26T13:43:41.750-04:00

NIce to meet you. There are so many ways to filter the noise without de-friending. Especially if you use your account with business or other community contacts. Gotta love that "hide" button :)

Also I am not convinced Dunbar's Number applies in the case that you are communicating asynchronously (for example, broadcast your thoughts to "followers") unless your "friends" list represents a functional community rather than the subset of computer literate buddies, friendly associates, family members, etc.

Just a couple thoughts, laters!

Chris

Thanks for that, Sarah! Do you think under a simil...

2010-04-23T15:02:09.543-04:00

Thanks for that, Sarah! Do you think under a similar policy that I'd be justified in "redoing" my list?

I had to make some policies for myself, and that w...

2010-04-22T18:32:21.673-04:00

I had to make some policies for myself, and that way if questioned about why I was or was not friends with someone, I could just point to my policy. So, that means less agonizing on my part when I get a requests.

What are the policies? For coworkers, I have to see them outside of work. For college buddies (95% are out of town), I would have to want to make arrangements to meet up if they passed through the city. For online friends, I have to have met them face to face.

Works for me.

I'm a couple years behind here, but I googled ...

2010-04-06T15:04:23.831-04:00

I'm a couple years behind here, but I googled "strenghs finder connectedness" and this post popped up.

Very interesting. We share all our top five themes expect instead of Empathy, I have Achiever.

I'm a writer and editor. Only Connectedness was a surprise to me as I hadn't realized how it could used as a strength.

I don't really know how to apply these strengths of mine, but they sure do explain why I rocked in school :-)

Hi bourie. I sometimes have the crying issue. It w...

2010-03-27T11:55:10.067-04:00

Hi bourie. I sometimes have the crying issue. It will strike when I'm not expecting it, when I become overwhelmed with the emotion - my own or others. I can only think of a few times that it may have gotten in the way. Generally, I run (physically or conversationally) before I get to tears. But the tears will come after the encounter.

I have empathy as my number one strength as well a...

2010-03-26T23:31:48.706-04:00

I have empathy as my number one strength as well and see myself in all that you have written.The only downside for me is that I cry easy. If my eyes tear up for any reason, I cannot reverse it. It has humiliated me in several discussions with my bosses and others. Do you have this issue? If so, did you find a way to control it?